Lycee Vaucanson

My first meeting with the chair of the Languages Department was enlightening. "The students aren't that bad," she said. This of course made me assume that they were, in fact, that bad. "And if you need to send one to the office, always send two - one as escort." I sat their calmly. All the screaming was inside my head. 'Why is she going over security rules and regulations with me before even discussing what sort of ENGLISH things she needs from me?'

It's now the end of the semester and it's true that "the students aren't that bad". Except of course for the few who are.

Last week I had the first fight in my classroom. Every Monday I have a group of twelve 17 year olds. They're a lively group. And by "lively" i mean "loud, inattentive, and rotten". I do have a softspot for one of these lively kids though. In my head I call him "Unibrow".

Unibrow was absent from my first month at the lycee. He had been suspended for fighting with "Frank Reed" on a school trip. He lives north of Lyon and boards at the school during the week. He has a full class load, works on the weekends, and travels over an hour by train twice a week. Typical of the North African students, his English is better than his classmates and he's more willing to make mistakes.

Unfortunately those mistakes are often physical.

Last Monday, after a backpack was bumped off a desk, he and "Matrix" postured, cursed, and eventually struck one another. Repeatedly.

It was over in about 30 seconds. Two other students pulled them off each other.

What did I do? Nothing. I'm not paid enough to get clobbered. Initially I thought 'They didn't cover this in our orientation.' Then I thought 'is there a bell or whistle I should ring/blow? should I run next door and get the real teacher?' Then I thought 'so this is what a fight looks like. Interesting that no one's pulling hair or kicking.' And then it was over.

And we resumed reading the material on "Michael, Arden, and Erika" for the remaining 20 minutes.

I spoke with Unibrow after class. He threw the first punch. I asked him why. "He looked at me with crazy eye" he said. Fully believeable. Matrix wears a floor length leather coat and has expressed interest in vampires. Now that I've seen him fight I might start calling him "Columbine". "Yeah, he's crazy," I said, (probably not smart to tell a student about another student) "but why'd you hit him? You've been in trouble before. Do you think after this the headmistress is going to let you stay?"

He digested this and finally said "I should try harder."

Which was warming for me simply because verbs like should, could, and would are difficult for them.

"No," I said, "you will try harder."

"Yes, I will try harder," he said, probably lying.

A week earlier, another student mooned one of the teachers I work with. He was suspended for three days. Three days seems to be the going rate. Unibrow and Matrix/Columbine will be out the first three days after vacation. And then, Monday afternoon, back in my classroom. Along with Frank Reed.